Our life is changing...

This blog is very hard for me to write, in the middle of writing it I had to leave the room. I cried for the first time over all of this. I had to cry as I realized how our lives have changed. Cry for how my children's lives have changed. Cry for so much hurt and pain this will cause.

I woke up one day to everything changed.

This is a picture from Ruark's 1st birthday December 31st, 2009.

The week of January 22nd was very eventful. On January 22nd, my 61 year old stepfather Chuck came home from Arizona with a 20 year old Hispanic stripper, who is his girlfriend. No explanation has been made to anyone from Chuck. Instead his mistress started texting my mother and my family, saying she knows how we must be feeling. What a coward. After 15 years of him in my life he's gone.

This was my wedding day. He walked me down the aisle along with my dad, and then danced with me at the reception.He drove us down for our sealing in the Salt Lake City Temple for our 1 year anniversary...This is from our Nauvoo/Missouri trip this year, we went to see my brother's family for a long weekend.

Without a look back at any of us who called him step dad, grandpa or husband he left. No one has heard anything. I spent most of the past 15 years hating this man, and just when I start to warm up to him as I have the past year...he's gone.

Mind you he's gone with a girl 3 years younger than me and the same age as his oldest grandson.

And life goes on...

You would think 1 divorce would be enough to deal with...not so for our family.

The same week of January 22nd Chase's parents filed for divorce and finalized divorce papers last week. The last picture I have of them together is from Ruark's blessing last year. Although we've had many family dinners and trips together since then, I never took my camera. We knew they were having problems, they have for quite a while. But after 25 years of marriage it's over.

So today I am sad, but the sun is shining down the road. I am thankful for Chase and my strong marriage, a marriage that is closing in on 5 years, and is happier with each passing day. I am hopeful and thankful my children will always have their parents together and will never taste from this bitter cup. Determined that I will live out my life and throughout eternity with our family intact and whole.